Claimed by the Hill of Doom

Saturday morning was a sobering dose of reality. Everything had been just fine on Xmas day, potentially all too easy. Perhaps I should have headed back to Chelmsford, kept running there for a little while, I'd have not realised my current limitations for a little while longer. The parkrun route in Chelmsford is everything a runner like me could want: tarmac, flat, well drained so no standing water. Nothing too energy sapping, perfect time for masking my current lack of training.
Instead though I took the car to Great Notley. I wanted to challenge myself, take on the hill of doom and get a true understanding of my current capabilities.
I was second to arrive on site, there to assist with pre event setup, ticking both the volunteer and running boxes. I'm a temporary addition to the GNPR core team to give me ED training so when the volunteer roster was short I was eager to still help whilst not sacrificing a run. So there is was, in shorts and a ludicrous Turkey Trot jumper, trying to comply with the Xmas jumper theme.
Saturday became a waiting game. The core team and volunteers waiting for someone from the on site cafe to arrive so that the event could get setup. Things weren't looking good when we'd noticed the amended opening times and Len, GNPR's ED was none the wiser. So it was time to make phone calls.
By 9am there was still no one in attendance so with a bench as the finish funnel it was time for the minimalistic parkrun. After a short briefing urging tourists and first timers to try and buddy up, it was on the start line. To say I was cold by the start would be an understatement! Under my Turkey Trot sweatshirt was a hot base layer as I'd presumed I would overheat, so with nothing to do but shiver beforehand, the cold was really getting to me.

The Run

It was a far smaller field that usual for the run, the cold temperature and windy conditions kept many people wisely in their beds. Time to start the insanity though.
I opted for a wide right route to try and at least keep dry for the first then metres! The trail path was littered with puddles, I'd probably add distance to the course just with my zigzagging. My first lap was reasonable, there was no doubting just how much hard work the conditions were. The final field of the lap was horrendous as you turned into it, muddy on the turn and then the option to either so substantially inside and cut the course, go straight and get soaked, or turn further and run in the longer, less saturated grass. I opted for the latter and then took an even wider line at the base of the hill of doom. 

All smiles at the start of the first lap. Deluded muppet.

Oh the hill of doom, how I've not missed you. Negotiating the climb was tough, the two runners just in front of me were also struggling, but I had more grip. Avoiding their slips whilst also striving for a vertical base was hard work, I eventually went to the long grass once more, a bit more purchase was available there. The photo of me towards the peak tells you everything about the run on Saturday. I was determined to not stop during the climb, but also aware that the sheer effort involve in achieving this would come back to bite me.
Being a man made hill the Garmin never picks up the climb, but at the peak I took a moment to veer off course to touch the bird, not many of my fellow runners showed such eagerness. The descend was all about not hitting the slick grass, any more rain and I suspect the route would be run without the hill, just a standard two lapper. 

Hill of doom - there to break you

After the climb and following downhill I was completely done, shame there was still another 2km to go. I had completely overcooked the hill. Though commendable to not stop on the climb, my pace had gone, like a cyclist with only first gear, everything was moving but very little was being achieved. My second lap high five to Andrea the bridge marshal was substantially weaker, more being used as a means to get myself going. After the relatively easy return on Xmas Day, this was a crashing back to earth. The lack of miles in my legs & cardio in my lungs was coming back to get me here, the treacle like conditions not making my life any easier!

The remainder of the lap was just a struggle. I was thankful for the low turn out, it meant the underfoot conditions didn't deteriorate too much. My pace was a write off, a 5:58 third km was followed by a 5:34 & 5:39. In fact only a quick first km was under the 5:30 mark. I crossed the line / reached the table in 27:34, over three minutes slower than my previous effort at Notley. Lesson learnt. Stopping was tough, the finish area completely saturated. Had I a change of clothes on me then I'd have been very tempted to Klinsmann my way through the funnel!

Such a happy face

The Eat 

GNPR is surely the foodie capital of parkrun. I regularly contribute a box of sausage rolls & with attendance significantly down, a number made their way home to Stansted for consumption throughout the day. One half of the new RD team Jenna had also attempted Tiffin, something GNPR is famous for. Nothing can be better than finishing a 5k and gorging on some tiffin & sausage rolls. Both were excellent (though I am biased).

Once home it was back to the Xmas carb loading (is nine months too early for Berlin). Fair to say this rest period combined with the festive period has led to a bit of weight gain. Thankfully nothing too drastic & restarting the cycle of training and cutting out the white carbs will return me to a happier weight.

That said, Saturday night was all about the rare roast beef, crispy potatoes (gave them a proper fluff up, though might have cooked at too lower temperature), parsnips, veg. So much food that it is now Tuesday & I'm only just realising we forgot Yorkshire Puddings!

Hmmmmm Beef

The Conclusion

If you don't like the truth, don't make a visit to Great Notley, especially during the winter. The course is tough (Run Britain gave it a SSS score of 5.0 - anyone?), unforgiving & a true test. Can't blame anyone that stayed in bed on Saturday morning, they were the sane ones.....